So today the vet came to see Sonny.   As she looked at him, she decided not to give him the acupuncture treatment like she has in the past.   She diagnosed him with a brain tumor and said the word….terminal.

Now normally I don’t buy into such things…you know the word…terminal.  Like when the doctors said that my dad was terminal.  I think what I said then was….’what the f…dad, what do they know?’   But as it turned out…they did know although their timing was a little off by two years… go Dad…and God…

I know its my choice whether to believe or not…But today when I heard her words I felt them in my soul.  In my mind I said ‘no thanks’ but still the words settled on top of me like a heavy wet blanket zapping all the energy out of me as they filtered through my system.

I look at Sonny and see that he’s lost weight and the right side of his face has changed….it almost looks like Dad’s did after radiation and chemo.  And he’s had neither.   His spirit is sweet and last night as we walked, he ran like he used to do when he was a puppy….and what I call his happy dance….

Since day one he’s been my happy dog…I love to watch him run, play, be………he’s so beautiful and just watching him fills me with such joy…so why the tears…because I’m believing in the words, a month up to six months….and I can’t bear to think of my life without him…he came to me during a really difficult time and for awhile there he was my constant reminder that yes…life is good.

So here’s the deal….I’m going to declare daily that he is healed, hoping and praying for the best.  And if it indeed turns out that his time is done…then I’m going to let him know every chance I have …how much I love and adore him………..my Sonny……..